Schommer.Life

It’s a new year. Time to make that New Year’s resolution that you’ll drop halfway through the month. 

What if you kept that promise to learn something new, eat healthier, or lose weight? What would things look like today if you kept that resolution last year? 

Keep it small and achievable.  You can set a new goal when you reach your smaller goals. My goal this year, my resolution, is to keep pushing forward. My mental health is my resolution. To keep pushing forward, letting things go, staying positive, and continuing to live this life to the best of my ability. And to try and do it with grace, peace, and joy. Recently, I have lacked the grace, peace, and joy. 

2025 was a struggle. We had our positive, fulfilling moments, and we had those times you don’t really want to look back on. My family certainly went out with a bang. The holiday season tested my depression, and I’ve had a difficult time bouncing back. 

It’s challenging to write about my own mental health when I’m struggling and not doing well. I don’t like being vulnerable and exposed. I know how important it is to speak up—normalizing the conversation about mental health to help others have these open and honest conversations with their family and friends. I’ve struggled with depression most of my life, and my family probably didn’t know until I started writing about it. I remember a few years ago, my dad and I having a conversation about someone we knew who was struggling, and he said to me, “I just don’t understand, what do they have to be depressed about?”

“Dad, you can’t judge a person’s depression by what you think they have going on.”

“I just don’t understand; none of my kids have ever been depressed.”

I laughed, “Dad, I’ve been on antidepressants for years, and I’m likely not the only one.” How my father was so oblivious as not to know how much I struggled was baffling. At the same time, I didn’t like to talk about it. 

Recently, my depression has been much worse. I’ve had an increase in sadness, irritability, feelings of hopelessness, and an increase in body aches and pains. I had surgery a week before Christmas, and with the stress of the holidays, family drama, and the lack of getting to the gym, everything began to feel overwhelming, and I was drowning in a relapse of symptoms. I felt exhausted from life and lacking interest in longevity. I knew I needed to do something, but I didn’t have the desire to do anything. I feel blessed to work in the mental health field and have the skills to recognize what is going on quickly and rely on my coping skills. Number one, read something positive. I reached for my daily bible verse. I believe it was staring me in the eyes when I opened my phone the other day, so that was helpful. Two, I got to the gym. I’m still on restrictions, so I opted for Yoga Restore. Three, write about it. Here I am. Last, remember what I love about life, thank God every day, even on the days I’m not feeling thankful, and speak positively, not negatively. This is a huge one. I need God and the universe to hear what I’m grateful for, not what I don’t want or need.  It’s helping. I am starting to feel better. Day by day, one step at a time. 

Most importantly, talk to someone. You’re not alone! 

**If you or someone you know is struggling with depression and/or suicidal thoughts, please reach out to the Crisis Lifeline. Call or text 988. 24/7 help is available and confidential in the moment.